Jul 25, 2013, 12:41 PM EST
The first 60 seconds of this video on NFL.com are borderline incomprehensible.
Michael Irvin, in assessing the Eagles’ quarterback battle–
Hey, you know what? I’m just going to type his words verbatim. You see if you can make heads or tails of this.
Question posed: Michael, is it an upset here if Nick Foles wins the starting job?
Michael Irvin’s response: Hey listen, man, we won’t know it, Bald (referring to Brian Baldinger), he makes a point to the fact that the reality will show when we hit the field with the pads, but we can surely make some uh uh uh analysis of what’s the situation here and the reality is. First of all, I think these situations bring out the best in Michael Vick. Michael Vick can [stops self, mumbles] … take it however you want to take it, he’s a fighter. He’s a fighter. That’s what he does, that’s who he is. And when he’s in these situations, where he has to fight, it brings the best out in him. And he doesn’t have that tether call–tether called Andy Reid, who I know, [gyrating] “No matter what happens I got a little safety net here,” he doesn’t have that, so he will fight to the end. In 2010, he felt like he was in the biggest fight of his life, trying to win people back after a long … let’s just call it absence … and all of those things, took over for the Philadelphia Eagles and did a wonderful job. I’m looking for Michael Vick, the fighter, to stand up and win that fight.
Let’s stop it right here. In one minute Michael Irvin has…
- Called Michael Vick a “fighter” or said the word “fight” seven times.
- Put these words in this order: “he makes a point to the fact that the reality will show”
- Referred to Vick’s “let’s just call it an absence,” as if we were either unaware he spent two years in federal prison, or it’s somehow uncouth to bring that up
- Potentially implied that having been in jail for two years makes him more worthy to be the starting quarterback because he had to “fight” his way back … because of his “let’s just call it absence.”
And in that minute, Irvin has done nothing to…
- Answer the question: “Is it an upset here if Nick Foles wins the starting job?” or the question on the bottom of the screen “Which QB is best suited for Chip Kelly’s offense?”
As for anything resembling a coherent take on the situation, Irvin finally hits on something potentially, remotely interesting here at the end:
Irvin: And guys, honestly, let’s just be real here. Let’s just stop playing around and put the truth on the table. Coach [apoplectic scoff] … coach would be crazy not to give the job to Michael Vick. With Michael Vick, it gives him an opportunity to get what we call what we call it a “mullet,” cause if it goes out and his offense doesn’t really work, and it’s Michael Vick running it, he can say it’s on Michael Vick and not on him. If he starts one of these young guys, he doesn’t have anywhere else to go.
I think he meant “mulligan.” Michael Irvin, everybody.
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