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Dallas Sucks – Futbol Edition

May 15, 2010, 2:33 PM EDT

Patton agrees I don’t know about you, but I am
absolutely sick and tired of all the closet Dallas cock-A-roach fans calling
local sports talk radio yammering on and on about Jeff Cunningham, Heath
Pearce, and Dax McCarty. I’ve had enough of walking down Broad Street and having
to see Dallas jerseys with Ferreira emblazoned on the back. Even Patton Oswalt
agrees that Dallas sucks.

Ok, that may not yet be the case
with our respective soccer teams, but I’d feel that way if it was. Our civic
hatred for all things Dallas moves to the futbol pitch late this afternoon as
FC Dallas comes to the Linc to face the Union (4PM/Live Well HD/Telefutura).
This is the Union’s first home game since the home opener on April 10th,
which was highlighted by Sebastien LeToux’s hat trick in a 3-2 win over D.C.
United.

Since we last saw our local XI on
home turf they’ve dropped five consecutive games. Some of those losses have
been competitive, others not so much (giving up three goals in consecutive
games the last two weeks to LA and Real Salt Lake).

Not coincidentally the recent spell
of bad form has come about since LeToux was injured in the US Open Cup loss at
New York. In his absence they’ve had trouble generating and finishing chances.
The chemistry between Fred, Alejandro Moreno, and LeToux has been missed. The good
news is that LeToux is expected to play this afternoon. They’ll also have
Stefani Miglioranzi back from his red card suspension. Beyond that I think it
is safe to say that Peter Nowak will trot out his default starting lineup
(Seitz, Harvey, Orozco, Califf, Arrieta, Torres, Miglioranzi, Jacobson, Fred,
Moreno, and the listed as probable LeToux).

Dallas comes into the game having
more often than not kissed their sister (2-1-4), which I suppose should not be
surprising considering they’re from Dallas. However, they’ve also been stingy
recently – recording consecutive clean sheets. They feature Dax McCarty, who
despite looking like a brat from an 80’s movie, is one of my favorite players
developed by the US Soccer youth program. He’s played on the USMNT alongside
Heath Pearce, who is helps anchor the Dallas defense. Be wary of Pearce getting
forward and whipping crosses into the box. His service has been excellent in
recent call-ups to the USMNT. Also, David Ferreira should present a challenge
for Jacobson and Miglioranzi in the center of the pitch.

I think consecutive west coast
trips took their toll on the Union. Returning to Philly and actually playing a
home game should energize the team. If LeToux does make it back I think he
provides the spark they’ve been missing. Oh, I almost forgot to include the “Union
player most like to be shown a red card” feature. So, here you go….

This week’s player most likely to see red: Cristian Arrieta, who
was atrocious last week.

Final Score Prediction: Union get back on the good side 2-0