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Happening Elsewhere: Won’t Get Favred Again

Aug 4, 2010, 10:00 AM EDT

Favre At this point, there's no point even getting agitated about it, is there? I did my fair share of hemming and hawing the first two times Brett Favre pulled the ol' lookey-loo on the NFL, but by now, why fight it? Life just isn't as interesting with Tarvaris Jackson. I think most of us assumed–or at least hoped–that Favre's return was so inevitable this season, given his obvious motivations (financial and/or sentimental) that we weren't going to need to go through the spin cycle a third straight year. But now that it's begun once more, it's just like oh, are we really that close to football season again? Fairrrrr enough.

So yeah, Brett Favre says he's retiring. Maybe. We think.

Naturally, nobody's entirely sure. The news is frustratingly (but predictably) third-hand–reporters say that teammates claim that they've received word via text message from #4 that he's not coming back to the Vikings next year. The reports, insubstantial though they may seem on the surface (as well as several layers below that), were still considered weighty enough for ESPN to essentially devote the day to analyzing them. (Cue the "Who still watches ESPN?" comments, and not undeservedly so I suppose.)

Normally, I'd say something like "I'll believe it when I hear it directly from him," but as we all know by now, even that doesn't mean all that much. Others have said "I'll believe it when he's not there to take the first snap under center," but even that's no good–what if he's on the Clemens half-season rental plan? Truth is, it's not until the final seconds tick off the fourth quarter of Super Bowl XLV that we can absolutely safe in the knowledge that the '10 NFL season will be entirely Favreless. Until then, we have no choice but to assume his return is forever imminent, lurking in Wranglers around the corner.

Eh, whatever. It is August, after all–the slowest month in pro sports. Personally. I'd rather talk about A-Rod being stuck at #599 the rest of his career, but I guess this'll do.